can we have a friend marry us in Australia?

I am sure we have all seen the storyline in a rom-com or a tv series, where a couple decides that they want to get married NOW. So a friend jumps online, gets ordained by someone on the internet, and the couple gets married then and there!

I am sure that this scenario is part of what fuels the question often asked on wedding groups and pages - can we have a friend marry us? The short answer for Australians is no (unless your friend also happens to be an Authorised Marriage Celebrant!).

In Australia, civil wedding ceremonies must be conducted by an Authorised Marriage Celebrant, who is registered with the Attorney General’s department. To become a registered Celebrant, they will have completed a Cert IV in Celebrancy, undertaken an application process with the Attorney General’s department, and must maintain yearly registration and professional development requirements.

This brings us to the next question that is often asked - can I ask a friend to get registered, so that they can be my celebrant?

Of course you can! But it really is quite a big ask of your friend. The course costs upwards of $1000 (depending on provider) and takes about 12 months to complete. The assessments are very involved, including staging and filming a mock wedding and several other ceremonies. After the course is complete, they will need to apply to the Attorney General’s department, which involves another fee and an approximately three month wait. There is then ongoing professional development requirements and an annual registration fee. Unless your friend really wants to become a celebrant (and the timing happens to line up with your wedding!) then I wouldn’t recommend going down this path.

However, I definitely understand the desire to have somebody who really knows and loves you be the one who marries you! One way that we can have the best of both worlds is with ‘co-pilot’ wedding ceremonies come in - an Authorised Marriage Celebrant manages all of the legal aspects of your wedding, while you have a loved one act as the main conductor of your wedding ceremony.

This is where get married with friends comes in. I put these packages together so that couples have the choice to have a friend or loved one play this key role in their wedding ceremony, without them needing to spend over a year becoming a celebrant! The other aspect of my packages acknowledges that while your friend may be a great public speaker or performer, and be able to lovingly tell the story of your relationship, they probably haven’t written or staged a wedding ceremony before. I want to set up your friend to do the best possible job, which is why I offer resources and support (as well as some quick tips and tricks!) to make the process as easy as possible. This means that they can focus their time and energy on writing you a truly personal ceremony, instead of googling “how to write a wedding ceremony”.

Maybe you don’t have somebody in your life that you think is quite right to be your ‘co-pilot’ celebrant, but you are still interested in having your ceremony feel personal, with input from your loved ones. If that’s you, reach out to me to talk about my get married with pip packages. I have lots of great ways to bring your family and friends into the ceremony while I act as your celebrant.

Title Image: Sally & Rhys’s Wedding at The Post Office Hotel, captured by Nikki McCrone.